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I Tried Making Juicy Couture Tracksuits Happen Again in the Year 2019

The year is 2004. I’m sitting in a pedicure chair (bowl: empty; shoes: on) and waiting for my mom to finish up work at her nail salon so she can take my fifth grade ass home. In this smartphone-less world, I’m flipping through one of those relics of the early aughts, one of those—how you say—magazines and just drooling over photos of celebrities in Juicy Couture tracksuits, wishing with all my elementary school might that I may someday get to wear the sacred velour sweatsuit. Fifteen years later, that wish came true. First off, yeah, 15 years is a damn long time, and my love for the Juicy Couture tracksuit has certainly fluctuated during that decade and a half—but my tiny,...

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