A good roommate won't "borrow" your stuff without asking. They will clean up after themselves and respect one's need for quiet time. A bad one, on the contrary, will repeatedly find ways to violate your personal space and all the healthy boundaries that allow two people to live under the same roof without strangling each other.
So in an attempt to remind you to be careful about who you move in with, Bored Panda put together a list of the worst roommate stories we could find. Sadly, as we searched the internet, we realized there was no shortage of those. But hey, one man's misery is another man's amusement, am I right?
#1he was responsible for collecting our individual rent payments and turning in the rent check to management. instead, he spent two full months' rent ($4100) on cocaine and take-out, then disappeared when the eviction notice was posted on our door.
Image credits: double_ewe
#2I had a roommate in college who could only fall asleep if he watched disney movies at night. I had to listen to them every night for hours trying to sleep. And I now hate the Lion King with the passion of a thousand burning suns.
Image credits: LoooveCommando
#3I had a roommate who would (attempt to) leave unjustified scathing, passive-aggressive notes for just *everyone*: our apartment neighbors, cars parked outside, and even our landlady. The kind of notes with overly-polite language, underlines, and randomly capitalized words. Always written in red marker. Always rude enough to get the s**t beaten out of her. Always signed from both of us.
I spent that year following her around and removing the notes as quickly and quietly as possible.
Image credits: petrilstatusfull
#4[Took out] my rabbit and used his bones to form some sort of makeshift Satanic summoning ritual thing on her bed.
I wish I was making this up.
I didn't even confront her, the next night when I knew she was working late at McDonald's I got a friend with a truck and got all of my sh*t out of there.
Probably the most stressful time of my college years.
This was probably the worst time of my life as I was getting clusterf**ked by stress because I had to juggle being poor in college, a sh*tty work study job, and a 21 Credit semester load so I could certify into a pretty competitive major. On top of that my roommate that I lived with initially straight up just dropped out of school and moved out without informing me a week before bills were due, I only made enough money to cover my portion and so I had to get a random roommate on Craigslist to come in.
My parents come from a very spiritual background so I've been raised not to f*ck with stuff of this nature, I'm not even going to look into whether or not this crazy thing even worked and I never want to see her again. Although if I did see her again she's getting a roundhouse to the face because my rabbit was awesome.
Moral of the story: Don't use Craigslist for roommates
Image credits: MisterPhamtastic
#5College roommate, freshman year in the dorms. She secretly kept an Excel spreadsheet monitoring my study habits. Like, counting the number of hours she saw my nose in a book. So fast forward to later in the semester, when I return from a party, here she attempts an intervention... "Hairymonkeyinmyanus, I'm concerned about your study habits..." then she brings out this spreadsheet from the entire semester, comparing my total number of hours studying to the number of hours that were "recommended by my advisor for the number of credits you're taking."
Image credits: hairymonkeyinmyanus
#6I came home from vacation to thousands of dead fruit flies throughout our refrigerator and kitchen, roach carcasses in the bathroom, and the news that her cat had vomited or marked its territory in one of a number of other ways in every room of the house.
She had not noticed any problems.
Image credits: bombass_horchata
#7I lived with a guy who drank rum like water and played the trumpet. But that's just the beginning. Although he couldn't play the trumpet. He would play the theme to "The Flintstones" but always got stuck on one note, I wanted to take a shovel to the trumpet right at the moment he would mess it up, put us both out of our misery. In addition he had a salt water fish tank. No fish could live in it because it was a green algae cesspool of filth. The smell was that of a soggy swamp sneaker in a hot gym locker. He would stand and stare at it and chuckle to himself. He also cooked pounds pounds and pounds of kale then would try and get the stalks down the garbage disposal, which alway broke it. He would wear a purple robe with no clothes on under it. Granted the guy meant no harm, he was just so annoying to live with. I still wonder to this day where he is. He went by a name other than his original so I don't know how to find him.
Image credits: mfwater
#8I discovered the crazy after the trash didn't get picked up for three weeks...
The first week, I figured they just missed us. Week 2, our can is full, so we leave a bunch of bags next to it. They take the bags, don't empty the can. Week three, I chase them down the street to see what the f*ck is happening. The guy tells me they won't empty the cans because they are full of two-liter bottles of urine, and they won't take the risk of one breaking and squeeting on them [sic]. One of my roomates has been pissing in two-liter bottles because he was too lazy to walk to the bathroom, which was literally right next to his room. Shared a f*cking wall even. There were dozens of these bottles he had been filling and putting in the trash. I had to pull them all out to get the trash people to dump our can, put them all in some doubled up contractor bags, and leave that sh*t in his room. Two weeks later, the bag is still there.
TL/DR roomate pissing in bottles because he would not walk 8.75 feet to the bathroom; city trash men wouldn't touch that sh*t for anything.
Image credits: allegedly-fool
#9College roommate hated us and the worst thing she did was put Nair in my conditioner.
Image credits: AmanoUsagi
#10Kidnapped two guys and held them for ransom. One hostage was set free weeks later while the other wasn't so lucky. The body was eventually found in a basement cemented buried in the ground.
Cops busted into the flat (I rented a room in an apartment - he lived in it before I moved in) and apprehended my roommate while he was sleeping. Tried for kidnapping and manslaughter along with his other few associates.
This was in Ontario, Canada around 2011/2012. I never really followed the story after I moved the hell out and learned that they were all in jail.
My roommate was Sohaib Malik. He seemed like a normal, nice dude. Student at the local university. Had no problems with him (aside from him using my kitchen knife without permission).
Image credits: InformationFetus
#11My old roommate always used the same pan for eggs and never cleaned it. For an entire year this pan was caked with eggs and just sat on the stove (which was also covered in egg splatter.) Even if I cleaned it for him, it would be back on the stove the next day.
Image credits: Quetzel
#12He listened to heavy metal music to 'fall asleep' without freaking headphones.... I couldn't last more than 2 nights.
Image credits: jintimus
#13Sophomore year rando craigslist roommate. She used to floss her teeth constantly and then just drop the used floss wherever she happened to be at the moment. The carpet was caked with it. She never did dishes, and made sure to use my dishes so that i would clean them. She was deeply Christian and was weird about me being Jewish. She would scream at me and be rude to my friends and then immediately post on Facebook about how jesus forgives her of her sins. I worked openings at a cafe near campus before class so I was always up during the week at 5am. She got a job at the cafeteria on weekend mornings, but would sleep through her loud ass alarm from 6 am to 8 am so I could never sleep in on the weekends. Oh and she kept unplugging my printer because she learned in one of her public health classes that printer fumes give you cancer (?????)
Image credits: snorfflez
#14Ran an illegal ebay theft and resale ring out of my apartment. I flew home to Texas to go to a family funeral and two days in to the trip had FBI Special Agents calling my phone, and telling me they had confiscated all the computers in my house.
I was cleared of all wrong doing, the FBI agents said it was clear I had no idea what was going on...but lesson learned. If your roommate is cagey with you about how they pay rent, it's probably not good.
Image credits: Brainling
#15Not actually my story but a friend of mine had a pretty rough time on her first week of living in a new place with a bunch of guys.
She originally wanted to rent with her friend but unfortunately her friend pulled out of the university course at the local university they were attending together, so she ended up having to find somewhere to rent alone. She ended up renting a room in a house share with 4 other guys (also students). After the first week she informed them she was going to the shop and they asked her to pick up some toilet tissue for the house. Unfortunately she forgot and they were pretty upset about it.
So the next day, after being out of the house all day she came home to find her bedroom walls and bed sheets smeared in s**t. It was their idea of teaching her a lesson about forgetting to get toilet tissue.
Image credits: mein_kampfy_shoes
#16this is actually about my friend's roommate, but that's hardly important. My friend's roommate comes stumbling into their dorm room (freshman year). It's blatantly obvious that she is drunk beyond reason. She starts shouting "I NEED TO GO TO THE BATHROOM", which wakes up my friend. She sees her roommate just staggering back and forth through the doorway. She stayed in bed because she really didn't know how to react. Her roommate returns through the door once more and reiterates that she needs to go to the bathroom. Before her roommate had left to go to a party, she had placed her white mac laptop on her chair by her desk. The rationale here, is that we believe the white from the laptop on the seat made the chair look like a porcelain load-throne in the mind of her drunken roommate. So she approaches the chair, pulls down her pants, and sits on her laptop. My friend braces herself because this situation can only go one way. As she braced for impact, her roommate releases a sigh of relief that unfortunately is synchronized with the release of her bladder and bowels. Despite her laptop being covered in p**s and s**t, her roommate denies that this ever happened.
TL;DR roommate drunkenly covers laptop in p**s and s**t
Image credits: storefront
#17She started stealing my clothes and went walking around in them to college. She seemed to be absolutely convinced they belonged to her until the day she left to move back home. I got a text saying "Found some stuff in my wardrobe that I think you might want. Bye." and sure enough, in her wardrobe, were my clothes, my socks and even my bath towels. Shocked, I took one towel out and a vibrator fell out of it and on to my bare foot.
Image credits: Gylly
#18I had a roommate who decided it was ok to use my towel to dry off after a shower and continued to do so even after I asked him to stop. He also used my washcloth. The funny thing was I had 2 washcloths I used, one for a good smelling body wash and the other I used exclusively for my ass, which I used regular bar soap on. The body wash made the other cloth look gray and the ass cloth was nice and white, despite the fact I hadn't washed it in months. Guess which one he was using?
Image credits: [deleted]
#19Probably the girl who dated the homeless drug dealer. He ended up moving in (without my permission) and started dealing out of our apaprtment (*definitely* without my permission). He also had the rankest boots I've ever smelled that he would leave in the living room.
Image credits: ashley1018
#20I had a roommate who (among other disgusting things) repeatedly left blood on the toilet seat when she was on her period and left her bloody pads sitting out. One time she left one on the radiator and it melted down to the metal.
Image credits: HeadlessPigeons
#21Had to reply since this is still recent. Met a girl on craigslist in a new town. Got along really well for the first few months, hung out, etc. After a drunken fight with her boyfriend where he kicked in her door and she pushed him down the stairs, she then decided I had been flirting with him (gross, by the way) and basically tried to kill me. I win, right?
Image credits: Smashface84
#22He drank my contact lens solution because he thought it was drugs. The whole bottle. A big bottle. Not only did he not figure it out while not being remotely high halfway through a f*cking pint of lens solution, if it had been drugs, he would've died a lot.
Bonus idiocy: Also claimed he invented lettuce wraps
Image credits: Graphitetshirt
#23I had a random room mate that showered once a week... ONCE. A. WEEK.
Thank God he was too lazy to go to class as well and lasted only two semesters.
Image credits: zirtbow
#24One of my friends had a housemate with a rather interesting routine... and he had (as far as I know) absolutely no idea that anyone else was aware of it.
His first step - at least from what I could hear - would be to close his door and address some imaginary woman who had apparently sneaked inside when he wasn't looking.
"Well, what are you doing here?" he'd say, his voice audible through the wall. "Uh huh. Oh, really? Well, I guess I'd better take my pants off, then."
A few seconds would pass, after which he would speak again. "So, how about you get naked, too? I'll just lay here and wait for you to be ready. Oh, you're ready now? Well, go ahead and climb on top of me, then."
It would be several minutes before anything else would become audible... but then the next part of his routine would begin. Anyone within earshot would hear the guy's bedroom door open and then slam, after which he'd sprint down the hallway to the bathroom and slam that door. He'd be in there for a few minutes, the toilet would flush, and then we'd all be treated to a second performance of him slamming the door, running down the hall, and locking himself in his bedroom.
So, in short order, his routine went like this:
"Oh, look, a sneaky woman!"
"Now we're both naked!"
More rapid footsteps
From what I've heard, he'd do this every night. At one point, someone suggested that he might have been talking to a webcam model or something, so they "accidentally" reset the router after hearing the guy's door close... but he went right through the same routine, talking to someone who wasn't there before beating a hasty retreat to the bathroom.
TL;DR: Imaginary intimacy, dumb dialogue, slamming and sprinting.
Image credits: RamsesThePigeon
#25When I moved in, I kept getting lots of tiny black dots on my legs whenever I'd walk across the carpet.
They were fleas.
Image credits: RedditMayne
#26He charged me $500 bucks to rent tiny room in his apartment. He said to feel free to use the rest of apartment, but there were all these rules so I just stayed in room for most part. Found out a few years later that he was only paying $500 a month for apartment. So...yeah...
Image credits: [deleted]
#27Oh boy, where do I even start? I'll just make a list.
I shared a 12x12 dorm room with her, for reference.
She would free bleed and leave trails of her period blood from our room to the bathroom and not clean it up.
She would leave crusty underwear on the floor on my side of the room, next to my bed, while at the same time she insisted we divide the room with tape, and freaked out if anything of mine crossed that border for 2 seconds.
She was 18 and had a creepy 31 year old fiance she had been with for six years (you can do the math) that stayed over every weekend, and watched her asleep over Skype every week night, with me in view of the camera.
She smelled so bad that other students in our hall started making complaints about the stench coming from our room.
The first thing she said to me when I met her was, "I'm bi, but you need to know that I don't find you attractive." As if I was going to be disappointed by that news.
She had a bunch of plants in the room that I was allergic to that were making me miserable, and she refused to get rid of them.
I also used to have a roommate who did meth in our basement and stole a bunch of my money, that was also pretty sh**ty.
#28I used to work the afternoon shift, which meant that I'd usually get home around 1am. My new roommate had just moved in a few days ago. One Friday night I get home, walk in the door and there's 50 odd people in our tiny apartment. There's people punching holes in the walls, my tv is smashed on the ground, there's a few people shooting up on my couch, the place is f**ked.
Not really knowing how to handle the situation I go into my room to try to think and when I open the door I get hit with a stink that will outlast religion. My new roommate is having some rather messy scat sex with another guy on my bed. There's sh**t alllll over my bed.
So I grabbed a beer, went outside, called the cops and watched the show.
#29Definitely the one who let his underage girlfriend have a home abortion in the bathroom upstairs.
#30I lived in a house with the girl who owned it, my boyfriend and 6 month old, and another friend. The girl that owned it didn't have a job and asked us all to move in to help pay bills so her parents (that bought her the house) wouldn't get f*cked on their loan. We'd been there maybe a month. This chick never left her bedroom in the attic, except when she snuck down to eat my food. She never got a job, or contributed in any way, except to ask when we were paying her. Did I mention she owned like three cats? Three cats she couldn't afford, might I add. I had to buy them food or they'd starve. She also NEVER EVER cleaned the f*cking litter box. And she kept it downstairs with all of us. It reeked of ammonia, with sh*t piled so high it spewed out on to the floor. I finally got sick of cleaning up her mess and told her that when I got back from work that litter box better be clean, I have a BABY living here and I don't like her being out of our room because it smells. I go to work. My boyfriend took our baby in the stroller (without a diaper bag, the idiot) to the store a block away. He didn't take the keys to the house. And that crazy b*tch locked us out. She refused to let him in. The baby was screaming for a bottle so he broke a window to try to crawl in to get her formula, which she refused to give us. He calls me at work, tells me what happened, and that the cops could only make her give us our baby things back. She swore we had NOTHING there and that we were trying to steal from her. I seriously want to kill that b*tch. I got some of my things back, after somehow getting legally screwed into paying her rent for all the time our stuff sat there while she was holding it hostage. She kept all my cool stuff. And she kept these nick-nacks that were sentimental (my grandmother had painted chess pieces, and I got some after she passed). I'm still pissed, and that was six years ago.
#31I was away on holiday. When I got home I walked in and the carpet was soaked. My roommates were just sitting there watching TV. Turns out the hot water heater exploded and ruined the carpet and flooded my room which was right next to the heater.
Turns out it exploded 3 days prior to me returning and they just ignored it.
#32She was a bit of a nightmare to begin with, the kind of person who would come home at 3AM on a weeknight bringing half the pub in tow. She was perpetually late on bills, and useless at keeping the kitchen clean.
She also had a bad habit when she went to take a shower. She was one of those people who would just drop/step out of her clothes, leaving them in a fabric puddle on the floor in the bathroom, and not collect them for days. Unfortunately she very frequently left very visible skidmarks in her underwear, spread out and sunny side up on the floor for the world to see.
One day I got home from work and went for a shower, and encountered her usual filth pile, but today something seemed wrong. Something seemed familiar. I coiled in horror when I realised that it was MY underpants in that particular offering. The fabric was quite unique, and they were now beyond ruined, caked with sh*t and blood. I confronted her, turned out she was not good at remembering to do her laundry so would regularly steal my clean knickers out of the drier then eventually sneak them back into my laundry basket. Yes I went to get a sexual health screen after that.
#33My roommate is one of my best buds but he has his vices. His class schedule starts much earlier than mine and when he showers in the morning he plays Lose Yourself on full volume. Every. Damn. Day. As soon as I hear those opening piano keys in any situation I wanna vomit.
#34Several of us were hanging out, he ran into the room, took a picture of my girlfriend, without explanation then ran back into his room and slammed the door and did not emerge the rest of the night.
I googled him about a year ago: he is now a registered sex offender.
#35Well here is my ex roommate story... Dated a girl for a while, she moved in and we ended up breaking up. I let her stay and move into one of the upstairs bedrooms because I made the mistake of feeling sorry for her. Fast forward a few years (yes, I'm a huge pushover and way too forgiving of people. I think she finally broke me of that.) And I finally had to kick her a*s out. It started small over the years, with her just being a general slob. However... She had the upstairs of the house more or less to herself. Large bedroom, her own full bathroom, nobody ever went up there to bother her. She also had a pet rabbit. I liked rabbits, they're cute and adorable... The rabbit however was not taken care of. She went back to Arizona for Christmas to visit family and asked me to watch the rabbit. Sure no problem... I go up to check on the rabbit, give it food, water, clean cage, etc, and the upstairs looks like a crack house. There is trash everywhere, just piles of dirty dishes and food wrappers just general trash. The bathroom looked like it had never been cleaned at all. Just layers upon layers of makeup residue and hair and trash. Ugh. And worse, the rabbits cage was this tiny thing designed for small rabbits and was too small for this one since she never let the rabbit out of the cage. And the entire cage was filled with rabbit c**p. The nails on the rabbit were long enough you knew they hadn't been taken care of in awhile. I was horrified. But, me being stupid, didn't immediately pick up a phone and b***h her out and tell her to keep her bags packed when she got back... No, I was stupid. I cleaned up upstairs, went out, built the rabbit a new much larger cage and took care of it. When she got back I told her flat out it wouldn't happen again.
Fast forward a few months and the rabbit is put for being sick. She starts posting on Facebook about how sad she was, etc. I sat there thinking, b***h, you didn't take care of it, why are you sad. I even offered to help her take the rabbit cage down after it happened. She declined.
Fast forward again and I'm wondering why all of a sudden the house is crawling with bugs. I start seeing ants and roaches in larger and larger numbers. Not cool. Then I start noticing an odor in the house, something rotten. I'm thinking something got in one of the attics and died. A squirrel or a mouse or something and that's what's caused this. So I venture upstairs and check one attic. Nothing. So I go to check the other side which is accessible from the roommates closet. I open the door and the room is once again a disaster area. Everything from blackened shriveled banana peels to fast food bags to piles of dirty dishes and clothes. And bugs crawling over it. I, understandably, was a bit upset. Even the rabbits cage was still there. Still filled with rabbit s**t. I was confident she hasn't changed the litter from when she got back after Christmas to when the rabbit died. I told her flat or she needed to clean her room now today this instant because I wasn't going to have the upstairs of my house become a garbage dump. She wasn't exactly happy with me but I didn't give a f**k at that point. I stormed out and left for a bit before I snapped and did something I would really regret.
So, being my dumb self, I assumed that given the situation and context that the upstairs would then be cleaned. That I got the point across. So I go upstairs a few weeks later to change the air filter in the ac system and lo and behold, the room is not only still filled with the exact same s**t it was before, there is new trash! I'm done at this point, I'm livid. I tell her when she gets home to clean the upstairs pack her bags and get out by the end of the week. She gives me a song and dance and sob story and all about how it will never happen again. You're right, it won't, you're not staying here.
No one should be surprised when they find out I still ended up having up clean the upstairs. The carpet was a loss and the entire house had to be fumigated. I even had to repaint the walls to cover stains since nothing would get them off. I took pictures. There are episodes of hoarders that looked cleaner.
#36I had a clean freak roommate who was crazy. She'd literally FREAK OUT and scream and clean up after you *while* you were cooking. I'd cut vegetables and be putting the first part into a pan, and she'd walk over furious that I'd left the cutting board out and messy for her to clean up....I'm *literally* still using it! I'll clean up when I'm done using the cutting board! She however only ate two things, chicken nuggets and popcorn....WHICH SHE NEVER CLEANED UP AFTER.
She cooked the chicken nuggets on the same baking sheet every day. And when it was so caked in nugget residue it would burn in the oven, she'd put a layer of tin foil over it and cook on that. And then when that layer was gross, instead of removing the tin foil layer, she'd add more tin foil over the top! When she moved out, she left the pan in the drawer under the stove covered in 6 layers of greasy burnt crumbed chicken nuggets. She couldn't stand me not cleaning a cutting board of vegetables half way thought cooking them, but apparently a baking sheet covered in 3 months of chicken grease and crumbs can go back in the drawer?
She also made herself popcorn every night, and then left the uncleaned pot on the stove all the time. That pot was never cleaned.
She did this before she'd go to bed....at 7pm. She's had the same bedtime since she was a child. She never went to bed after 8 pm. If you made it past 9 without waking her up though, she was a sound sleeper and the noise level wouldn't wake her.
She would invite her nieces over with no warning. So I was working retail at the time and had just worked an inventory until 4am. I got home and at 6am she and her neices aged 6 and 9 started playing games that involved shrieking. We'd never have any idea children were even in the apartment until the morning activities and she would get furious at us for implying we'd like them to keep it down until 8 or 9 because "this is just as much her place as ours and she can do whatever she wants!" However, if we had anyone stay for more than 2 hours she'd ask us to pay a higher share of the rent because they now counted as an additional resident of the apartment and we needed to be responsible for the burden.
She'd watch TV in her room with the door open, and get mad if you made too much noise in the living room on the other end of the house while she was watching. But she would never change the volume, or close the door. If she couldn't hear, she'd lecture you about roommate respect and watching the volume instead of shutting the door and turning the volume up a small smidgen.
Remember when I said she was a total neat freak and would walk around the kitchen cleaning up after you while you were still using items to cook? She made a big deal about how the cleanliness of the kitchen was of the utmost importance. I got off work 2 hours early one day and walked in and what did I find her doing? Cutting someone's hair....IN THE KITCHEN! There was hair all over the stove, counter and floor. Vegetables are a kitchen abomination, but she cuts people's hair in there twice a week and doesn't think it's a big deal at all.
Finally she was moving out. She let us know about a month ahead of time that she'd be leaving, and slowly started moving her stuff. This was her last, and greatest F**K YOU: She charged us for the last month's internet service....and the first thing she moved out was the router, which was hers. She refused to reimburse us the month's internet, and hadn't let us know ahead of time she'd be taking it for us to go get a new router.
Then when she was upset we asked for our money back, she exacted revenge. The table and chairs we ate at were hers, because she insisted they be the common furniture because it was the only stuff she trusted. We couldn't fit our table and chairs in until she moved them out and she knew it. So she left the table, our only place to eat, and she left the chairs, the only place to sit and eat.....and she took the mother f*****g cushions off the chairs. She had her brothers unscrew the cushions on all the chairs and take them, but leave the unusable chairs and table for 29 more days out of spite. We tried to move her chairs to put our usable chairs down, and she hid all of ours into a closet in her room and set the chairs with no seat back at the table.
I still hate her guts.
#37I lived with a guy who charged me and another guy an extra fifty dollars a month saying the rent had gone up, only to find out he was pocketing it all along
Image credits: Mypopsecrets
#38My roommate once asked for the place to herself for a romantic evening with a chef she was dating. He made her a huge seafood dinner. When I came home the next day, there was a huge pile of dishes in the sink. Her reasoning: it was my turn to do dishes. We fought about it for days, as the lobster pot and all accompanying dishes stunk up the joint. In the end, I did them because I no longer could tolerate the smell. She moved out shortly, thereafter.
#39One of my roommates in College:
Insulted me daily, threw stuff at me from across the room, wrote mildly insulting music regarding me and sang it poorly.
The worst however was borderline stalking behavior. I went to the library, so did he. If I left for somewhere when he wasn't in the room for whatever reason he would hunt me down, he was scary good at figuring out where I was going. I became better at hiding where I was going. I left town for a day in the middle of the week. From what I heard he spent hours going to all my usual spots.
Oddest behavior was when he made an account on an MMO I played just to follow me around and spam insults in chat. 4 accounts of his got banned before he gave up.
He eventually dropped a lot of the behavior when he somehow landed a girlfriend. I was about a day away from going to the room advisory office and demanding one of us be moved to a different room or killing him and hiding the body.
#40My first roommate in college was a weird one.
He used to listen to weird a*s music, on blast, on repeat for weeks. All day every day.
He would set his alarm clock to ring every half hour from 4AM to 9AM. And it would play through his iHome speakers, and of course it would be that one that sounds like my head is inside of a clock tower bell. *Especially after staying up late to party the night before.*
We only had one cord for the cable in our dorm, and **every time** I asked him if I could use the cable on my TV he would say no with much hostility. Even if he wasn't planning on using it. So I'd ask if I could just use his TV to watch cable and would be again met with a hostile, "NO!"
One time he went through my s**t because he "thought he smelled something rotten" only to find my weed stash. He then reported it to our RA. Luckily, I knew the RA from my hometown, so I got the benefit of the doubt (and my weed back). But after that happened I was just like, "Da fuq?"
#41Hoarder. Even her piss and sh*t, stored in milk jugs.
#42We were both slobs, so that wasn't a problem at all.
I did have a problem with him using my computer for cybersex and other garbage nearly all the time (It was 2004/2005). He also used some of my toiletries (deodorant, shampoo, body wash) which is just wrong.
We had a falling out over something completely stupid and when he moved his stuff, he took the couch (We didn't buy it, someone else was moving out two doors down and gave it to us). I came home one day after work, saw the couch was gone, and said, "Huh, he took the couch. that sucks."
From there on out, I never had another roommate again.
#43I lost the random roommate lottery freshman year of college. She was a foreign exchange student from China, and we had NOTHING even remotely in common. Here's a list of my favorite things she did to me.
•She would wash her clothes in the sink, not the washing machine downstairs. She would hang the clothes up to dry, even on my side of the room. I finally convinced her that she couldn't hang her wet clothes on my TV. I came home one afternoon and she had hung a wet dress over my closet door. It was soaking, and had ruined all my pictures from home. She came back to me crying on the floor and she patted my shoulder and said "it OK. It only photos."
•She liked the room hot. Not warm, HOT. She would turn the thermostat up to 85°. I tried to talk to her over and over about a compromise, but finally I got fed up. I ended up opening the window when it was 15° outside. We both got sick as s**t, but at least I wasn't so f*****g hot.
•She told me I had to take my room decorations down. The bedroom should be a peaceful place and my pictures of home were too busy.
•She hated my boyfriend. He would come over, and we'd sit on my bed and play Xbox. When she would come back from class and see him there, she'd take all her clothes off, turn the lights off, and go to bed. Didn't matter if it was 3pm or 9pm.
•Instead of talking to me about my boyfriend, she told the RA I was bullying her.
•She would blow dry her hair while I was doing homework. In the room. Using the plug next to me.
•She refused to take medicine for things. I get that it was her culture, but she would lie on the bed and scream (literally) from menstrual cramps. Didn't matter if it was 4 am the night before finals. She was screaming and chewing on a ginger root.
Sorry for the wall of text. She was evil.
#44Got a bottle of Johnny Walker Blue for my birthday from a friend. I went out of town. Roommate proceeds to drink half the bottle and then fill it up with water like I wouldn't notice. And then had the audacity to lie about it and continues to til this day. I do believe he doesn't remember though. He got laid off after getting a dui. Proceeded to drink himself stupid for eight months and was eventually taking our rent money to pay his car bill. Didn't realize til we had an eviction notice. Forced him to get his parents to pay for our three months of rent he didn't pay but I still have an eviction on my record. I have a copy of the notice that says I was not evicted so wherever I go I have to show that to future landlords or when I buy a house so we don't get denied.
Image credits: RandyJackson
#45Was living with one of my friends in college over the summer when he had a severe mental break (later diagnosed with type I bipolar). I come home after being away for a few days and find out some switch has flipped and he's completely lost it; he hasn't slept for days, he's convinced everyone is conspiring against him, hallucinating and talking to himself to the point where he has no idea what's real anymore. Eventually I convinced him to let me take him to the ER, they ran a tox screen and found nothing so they released him. Luckily his mom lived across town, so I call her and she takes him to stay with her. His mom isn't properly caring for him or getting him the help he needs though, and a few days later I wake up at about 2 am to a loud banging at my door. Turns out my roommate had left his mom's in the middle of the night, walked about 3 miles back to our place without his shoes, and was trying to slam one of the patio chairs through the door. For some context, he is over 6" and I am about 5'2" female, so when I open the door to see him with a metal chair over his head and he starts saying things like "I've finally figured everything out, I know what to do now" with a crazed look in his eyes, I'm officially pretty terrified. I didn't sleep at that house alone after that night.
#46In college I had a roommate who tried out/played for the baseball team. Now this dude was a pretty big guy and during any workout out he would sweat like a whore in church. During the entire baseball preseason this guy did not shower once. I think we were going on two full weeks before he actually showered and this was only because we talked to his girlfriend. She didn't go to our school, but when she came to visit we asked her to talk to him. They were in his room and we could hear her telling him how gross all this was through the wall.
On top of his refusal to shower, he chewed tons of tobacco and left his spitters everywhere. We had to make a rule about them because asking politely wasn't cutting it. He also had this mudjug that he would spit into and he would never clean it out so we had this pugnant chewing tobacco and spit smell in the apartment. At once point we took his mud jug and put it in the shower and pulled the curtain shut. He got pissed because he thought someone stole his jug (why would anyone steal it??). If he would have taken a shower at any point he would have found the jug.
I do not miss this man.
#47My roommate (lets call her NR for New roommate) moved in with the three of us because the former roommate couldn't keep up on rent. I got along well with all my roommates, and their animals before this one.
First, NR moves in and her boxes filled the living room ceiling to floor. They stayed there for over 2 weeks. I worked crazy hours and wasn't home when she was, so I wrote a few short note simply asking that she move her boxes so I could have company over that weekend.
Well NR didnt like that. She stormed into the kitchen to yell at me with one other roomate and as she walks out, kicks my 3 month old SLEEPING PUPPY into the closest wall. I dont remember much after that, except I was so enraged my other roommate had to pull me into my room to calm down.
We did take puppy to the vet. He had bleeding inside his mouth, lost a tooth and was badly bruised. He is healed, but he now has a fear of females. He used to be the sweetest dog. D F*ck NR
#48I was living with my now ex-boyfriend, and he let a friend from work move in. She was a 20-something college girl - a bit thin and overly tan and made up, but nothing out of the ordinary. We quickly noticed that she loved to order delivery/take-out, and tons of it - pizza, chinese, Mexican, you name it. But she'd never eat in the kitchen/living room - she'd only eat in her room, usually with her TV or music turned up. Being in our young 20s, we joked rather callously that she was probably bulimic/binge eating but didn't seriously believe it, until our food suddenly started to go missing. It came to the point where my ex was hiding a bunch of food in our bedroom to keep her from taking it.
One day she wasn't home, and we wanted to order a pizza or something. My ex went into her bedroom to grab the phone book (this was mid 2000s; it was a thing, okay?). When he opened the door...oh god, the SMELL. He called me in and we were both gagging. We decided to snoop and figure out what the smell was, and when we opened her closet there were dozens and dozens of plastic containers of her vomit.
He ended up confronting her about it and she just flat out denied it - we were making it up, we didn't see anything in her closet, and how dare we go into her room. He (and myself, to be fair) didn't handle it in the best way and he was rather cold and defensive about it and unloaded on her about stealing food and how disgusting the smell was and how could she live like this, etc etc.
She moved out immediately, needless to say. Not sure what she did with all the puke containers, but thankfully they were out of the apartment, and to her credit she cleaned the crap out of the room.
My ex ended up writing a letter to her parents telling them that their daughter had a serious problem/disorder, but to my knowledge never heard back. I hope she got help and is doing okay.
#49I had a roommate for a few months who was your standard awkward/angry ginger. He would sit in the middle of our shared room in his tighty whities and apply lotion to his entire body EVERY DAY AFTER WORK. He would also make random plans with me days in advance (hey man I just got the new season of metalocalypse want to watch it with me in 4 days?) and then not mention it again. I would come home and he would be very angry with me and yell at me about blowing him off for the plans we made...
#50I don't know why this gets to me as such, but the dude actually shaved his thick facial hair dry, and left all of the stuff all over the bathroom counter. For weeks at a time. I would mention this fact to him, and he would constantly say sorry, but do nothing about it. This resulted in me cleaning his mess when it got too extreme. F*ck you, Kyle
#51This guy would do meal prep. Cook a weeks worth of dinners on Sunday night and keep them in Tupperware containers.
Here's the problem. He would start cooking late, get tired, fall asleep, burn his food and set off the smoke alarm.
Every. Single. Week.
Not a Sunday night went by that I wasn't woken up by the piercing screech of the smoke alarm at 2AM.
#52She had a room with her own bathroom and would constantly clog her toilet by using napkins as toilet paper since she didn't want to buy toilet paper. After she clogged it she would resort to using everyone else's bathroom in the hallway with no intention of fixing her own.
One day she clogged OUR toilet as well. So while she was out, me and my other roomies went into her room to see what was up with her bathroom and there was month old sh*t still in the toilet, along with piles of clothes all over the floor. She also had 2 dogs that she neglected and she always tried to take our community recycling and keep the money for herself.
She was the f*cking worst, so we turned her last name into a thing you don't want to be.
Don't be a Koob.
#53I went to University in the UK in 2001, at which time shared rooms were still fairly common (I believe they are much rarer now). I was put into a room with an intensely cool, very urbane and charismatic guy from London, where I was a very shy, hugely awkward and literary guy from the rural East of England. Naturally, we didn't exactly hit it off, and I always felt he was a little let down by me, reducing as I did the chances of room-mate japery and high-jinks.
Early in the semester, around November time, my room-mate, who already by this point had given up trying to communicate with me in any meaningful way, invited some good friends from London to stay with him. In our room. I briefly met them in the early evening, but they went out into town and stayed out late. I stayed in my room with a bottle of red wine and a copy of *Last of the Mohicans*, so I was pretty happy to enjoy the space. I fell asleep.
I was woken by the sound of groaning and strange, grotesque noises of general discomfort and unhappiness. Confused for a while, I peered into the darkness trying to figure out what was going on. The groaning continued, and then I spotted the silhouette of someone by the window, seemingly gazing out into the night. Then I heard the sound of trickling water, which soon established itself into quite a noisy torrent. My first thought was that it was raining, but the brief glow of a car's headlights as it passed revealed that there was a strange man (one of the London visitors) standing and urinating very confidently and purposefully against the radiator underneath the room window. He was making those satisfied, gleeful noises that any man will recognise, suggesting that this p**s was well-needed and a real delight. Unfortunately, my new coat, bought only two days before, was on said radiator and was now glistening with the p**s of the inebriated. For drunk he was. In fact, I found out the next day that he was totally off his tits on cocaine and that he, his friend and my room-mate had had a pretty hard night on the town, drinking and inhaling all kinds of s**t. Now, for a rural lad of no experience, this was all a real eye opener and I decided from that moment I would never touch drugs, and I still haven't.
My roommate moved out soon afterwards, leaving me a room to myself.
#54He sh*t. In the mother. F*cking. Kettle.
F*ck you, John.
#55I lived with a magician.
Of the many moments the odd one that I remember vividly was when he was about to leave the country for near about 2 months. Before he left (hours before going the airport) he filled the freezer with whole chickens. Then got really upset when we ate them to free up space.
Image credits: superfrankii
#56Hope I'm not too late. I had a roommate who was extremely conservative and really religious. She was also VERY frugal. She insisted on doing the dishes every night, but would only use 1 drop of soap for the entire load. It got to the point where it became habit to pull "clean" dishes out of the cabinet and quickly wash it before we could use it.
I also had pet frogs that summer. Frogs that like temperature control. Well this frugal roommate went on a rampage during the hottest week of the summer and tried to ban us from using the air conditioning to save money. We would all fight back and turn it on when she wasn't home. After a few weeks of this, one of our other roommates did some research. Turns out, the breed of frog I had likes to get frisky when their environment gets too warm. So we all agreed to let her control the a/c for awhile. We also moved the frogs to a more prominent location.
About 2 days in, little miss conservative walked in to see the nicely displayed frogs humping each other to no end. She screamed, demanded to know why we were letting this happen. We told her about the research and that if she wanted it to stop, then let us have air conditioning. We spent the rest of the summer in air conditioned bliss. The weird thing is that she was pretty well off, so we don't know why she was so cheap.
Tl;dr humping frogs brought air conditioning back.
Image credits: c_turtle_of_DOOM
#57It is hard to put into words how much I hate my sophomore year roommate. The school I went to had 300 students, not a large school in anyway, and somehow he lost his backpack. So he decides to borrow my expensive hiking backpack and use that as his backpack until he can find his. But he doesn't tell me, and he doesn't care about my backpack. Hiking backpacks have straps around the hips so the weight will rest on the wearers hips instead of their shoulders. At the time I was really into mountain unicycling, which means balance is important, and if I ever wanted to bring anything with me I needed that backpack. Anyways I find the backpack a month later filled to the brim with "red hots" and "jelly beans". They are not in bags they are just emptied into the backpack. The backpack was in a random hallway, like he just forgot about it. Also he had found his backpack three weeks ago, and I had assumed it was back under my bed. And finally all of the supportive straps that made it a hiking backpack had been torn off, effectively making it useless to me. I asked him what happened to my backpack and he just looked at me, looked at the backpack filed with red hots and just said "somebody else must have done that because I put it under your bed" and just went back to his nap.
TLDR; roommate ruined $150 backpack.
#58My first roommate at college was a girl who had some severe issues... she was bulimic and would cut herself. She never talked to me and I only deduced these things by finding the bloody tissues under her bed (and having just lived with my brother who was suicidal and self harmed a lot) and also following the trail of vomit smell to the closet where she apparently kept it. F**k if I know why since we had a suite and our own attached bathroom. She would also bring up containers of food to leave out to make it look like she was eating. When I talked to the RA about this and they forced her to speak with a therapist, she threatened to smother me in my sleep and I was told it was in my best interest to move out.
My first year at college was not fun :(
Image credits: anon
#59My flatmates left a bottle of milk out on the kitchen table for 3 whole weeks. I didn't throw it out because rotten food makes me gag- it was basically solid by the end :/
#60A friend of mine needed a roommate in a house where he already held a lease. I moved in and paid him rent instead of adding my name to the lease. I lived there for about three months and it was great. He was always cleaning, literally always. It seemed pretty great until I came home from work one day. There was a pink note stuck to the front door that said we were being evicted because we hadn't paid rent in three months. Turns out that cleaning was what he liked to do while high on meth. It all worked out though. I talked with the landlady and she kicked him out and I took over the lease.
#61Honestly, I think i was the worst roommate. I went through a pretty bad s**t phase, and would really just sleep with any girl that was at least a 5. Come back to the dorm around 3 in the morning typically to have sex and my roommate would always be there. He left after about 3 weeks.
#62She called an ambulance on our other roommate in the middle of the night because she thought our roommate was cutting.
Her evidence: there were red spots on a towel.
What actually happened: our roommate dyed her hair red. Which she showed off the day before to everyone.
She didnt even tell anyone what she found. She just assumed the worst and called the authorites.
#63I had a roommate who absolutely refused to buy toilet paper. After weeks of her stealing ours, the other 3 of us started hiding it so she would be forced to buy her own. Instead, she started taking heaps of napkins from restaurants and stealing rolls of our paper towels. One night we all went out to dinner, came home, and the entire basement was flooded because she backed up the toilet with god only knows how much s**t that shouldn't ever be flushed. That and she would keep piles of old food laying around her room...never did laundry...most disgusting human being I've ever met.
#64So I was in prison.
Well it was a maximum security but most of us were in pretrial detention. 23 hour lockdown.
One of the problems in my opinion was that they didn't separate the inmates based on what they were charged with. You had 20 year old kids who were caught with a couple grams of coke, you had pickpockets, you had drug dealers and killers all together.
Anyway. I made a good friend and we were cell mates. It was as good as it gets, considering the situation. We were reading a lot, talking all kinds of stuff from history to politics to differences between our countries and cultures, personal details, eating together, etc.
Then they put in a new guy with us.
Sketchy looking motherf*cker from the same place as me. He got out after 18 years for murder then 2 months went by and got arrested for stealing. Anyway in my life I met a lot of people who did bad things. But most of them had an excuse/reason I could find plausible.
But this crazy eyed bastard was the type that could either fly into a blackout rage or smile and laugh with you then slit your throat in your sleep.
He ruined the whole cell dynamic, would get very paranoid at times, belligerent against other inmates and guards, started to make shivs and stuff mumbling to himself about punishing perceived insults etc.
Me and my friend were actually sleeping in turns at times to be ready in case sh*t pops off.
Just horrible. It made our time way worse.
#65My freshman year, I had a crazy roommate. He was a bigger guy with a p**nstache who thought all the women around him desired him. He tried very hard to make people like him, and failed miserably. He also had some sh**ty roommate habits. For example, he would set multiple alarms in the morning and not wake up when they went off, which forced me to get up and wake him up every time (it was a college dorm where we slept in the same room). He would also drive like 80 MPH on residential roads to to try and impress people.
Anyway. After 4 weeks of creeping everyone out in the hall and alienating himself, someone took his iPad as a joke. He freaked out and threatened multiple people, saying he would hack their computers and destroy their lives. Eventually someone told him his iPad was in one of my friend's rooms. He went inside, grabbed the guy, put a knife to his throat, and asked him where the iPad was. The cops came and he was expelled. But after that I didn't have to share my room the rest of the year, so that was cool.
#66Lived in a fairly small apartment with 3 roommates, two of which I was friends with and one random girl. The random girl would turn down our A/C so low that one day it stopped working because it was literally frozen. We asked her to stop so many times but she just ignored us. Our electric bill was always so high, one month it was $400. She also came home with a cat one day but she was never home to take care of it so she just left it in her dark room all day. We would play with it when we could but one day it was just gone.
#67My roomate wanted to chill a warm six pack a miller light. He saw a myth busters that he could use a fire extinguisher. He used the wrong type, it was a dry chemical type not a C02. It was a mess.
#68I lived with a roommate who was a complete and total narcissist. It was a $1500/mo apartment (three bedroom in a nice part of town) that should have been $500 a person, but he was a lazy s**t and maybe contributed ~$150 of that. His dumb twat girlfriend wasn't much better, contributing about the same amount per month but she was at least more pleasant to talk to.
I lived with them for about six months and paid the $1200 I was paying to cover the rent because I didn't want my credit to take the hit that would result from an eviction.
The whole time they were going out to eat and wining and dining each other; meanwhile I never could do anything because I was burning up all my cash just trying to cover the rent.
Of course I would talk to the dude to say "man, this can't continue, it's stressing me the f**k out, I can't afford to buy food most of the time" but since he was a piece of s**t narcissist, he would turn the argument around to somehow make it about how ungrateful a person I was.
The end finally came when I spoke with the leasing office people and explained that while I loved the apartment, I was the only one who was really giving the property managers any real money and the situation was untenable. I also said I would love to continue doing business with them (possibly with a smaller apartment), but I was locked into my lease and couldn't afford to pay an early termination fee because these assh*les I lived with were sucking me dry.
They looked up the paperwork and said "well it looks like only [piece of s**t] filled out lease paperwork so you have no legal obligation to pay the rent."
"Is that so?" I responded. I thought for a few moments and then said to the agent "you should probably get eviction paperwork ready for next month. I have no intention of continuing to fund their lavish lifestyle. What other units do you have?"
I went back to the apartment and began packing. One day they came home to see that my bedroom was empty and my car was gone. They started packing like crazy for three days, having to throw a lot of it away because they were going to get locked out before they could get it all. On the second day, the power was turned off, because it was in my name at the old apartment and now that I had my own place I wasn't about to pay for the power in two different places. So they had to frantically pack, in the sweltering July heat in total darkness. F**k those people.
#69The worst story i have is just really creepy. She was a great roommate but i couldn't sleep right for a month after.
So it's literally the first night we are sleeping in the same room, so things are already a little awkward since we only know each other's names. But night falls and we go to sleep. I wake up to the sound of her yelling "NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOO" and then she flings all of her blankets off of her bed and onto the floor. At this point I'm freaked out so i ask if she's okay and she doesn't reply. Instead she sits up and looks around, sees the window and kind of whispers "not the window..." then she stands up and walks to the window. At this point i realize she must be sleep walking, or crazy. She gets to the window grabs the lock with both hands and is locking and unlocking the window over and over again while whispering to herself. She never opened it, but after about 3 minutes of that she let's go and says "that'll do". And then starts walking back to her bed, but when she was passing by my bed she stopped and turned to face me. Then she just stood there sleep (i hope) staring at me for a good 2 minutes. Then she started whispering to herself again walked passed her bed to the door, dragged her hand down the middle of it, turned around and walked to her bed and went back to sleep.
I was terrified, but i never told her about it. She never did it again.
#70I had to work abroad for three months. I came home to discover the bathroom light bulb had blown just after I left. Roomie felt she couldn't change it herself so called an electrician. Electrician laughed at her and told her she could save a fortune and do it herself. She still hadn't done it by the time I got back.
Needless to say I fixed it in about 5 minutes. It would have been sooner but I couldn't stop chuckling at the thought of her s******g in the dark for months.
#71Circa 2001. It was my first apartment and I wasn't a good judge of roommate character back then. I was working at a welding shop and had befriended this big Mexican guy after driving him home from work enough to start hanging out at his house after work for a few beers and his mom's excellent biscuits and gravy she'd make for us.
Naturally, we thought it would be a good idea to roommate at my place to cut down on expense. Little did I know, he was one of those drinkers that black out and destroy everything. Each day after work was him with a case of beer and getting in arguments with kids in Yahoo chat rooms over a mic until he would pass out.
It escalated. He quit going to work and I'd come home with him passed out, vomit all over the floors, p**s in the corners, half-eaten pizza face down on the couch, the works. I started telling him he needed to leave but he wasn't hearing it. Eventually he got arrested for something and ended up in jail. I was free. For a while. He got out and I woke to banging on my door. I didn't let him in. (His mom collected all his things when he got locked up)
Fast forward to recently, I'd been overseas for 6 years and moved back to my home state afterward, and recently stumbled across his Facebook page after not having seen or heard from him in 13 years. We talked. He's doing really well now, training to be an addiction counselor, and I'm happy for him.
#72My friend's roommate freshman year was a mess. First night of college (and the first time she met my friend) she got wasted, came back to the room, tried to climb into my friend's bed (while said friend was in it), fell off, peed in the corner of the room, and puked on my friend's bed before passing out in it. Never apologized or acknowledged it.
#73Moved in with a friend.
We set up a number of rules before moving in with one another, just simple stuff: no people over past midnight, no girlfriends living here, split the cost of cleaning stuff etc. All of which he constantly broke. His girlfriend basically moved in with us and lived on our couch. She was terrible, basically abusive (turns out she was gay, not sure how that factors in, but she obviously had no love for the guy when they were dating), didn't pay for anything.
He was constantly keeping me up at night as he didn't have to work, so I was sleep deprived the entire time we were living together. On top of that he snored like a monster, and he would get extremely angry if I brought it up. I offered to buy him those breathing strips, but he basically told me to copulate with myself, as he "didn't snore." I would actually stay at my parents place to get away from him on the weekends.
He would do some really inconsiderate things, like one time he bought an organ. Like one of those old electric organs they have in churches, and just stuck it in the living room. Never played it, just wanted to have it. Despite the fact our apartment was freaking tiny.
We fought a lot, and it really ruined our friendship. We're both somewhat messy, and neither of us was used to dealing with another person's mess. It came to a head when my younger brother (14) attempted suicide. After he got out of the hospital I invited him to stay the night so that he could be out of his old environment and we could just chill. My roommate threw a fit because, and I quote, "I don't want him here, because I don't want him to make a mess if he kills himself here." So that friendship was over.
He told me to move out, said he would cover the rent, he just didn't want me there. So I packed up my s**t and left. Then once all my stuff was packed and loaded up in the truck he changed his mind. My name was also on the lease so I was on the line, the lease contract stated that you had to give notice two months in advance before canceling your lease. Roommate agreed to two months (this was at the beginning of the month, so I payed for 3 months I wasn't living there.) I call the landlord, he says "ok, we'll get your name off the lease in 2 months"
Didn't talk to him after that. 2 months later I get a letter saying that I'm being sued by him, saying that I still owe him money for the rest of the year, guess he changed his mind again. And since we only had a verbal agreement, I'm probably liable for another 2 months.
I show up to court, he doesn't, case gets thrown out with prejudice. I get another letter a few months later saying that he's trying again, and that he missed his court date because the correspondence from the court was "vague". Killer strategy, blame your ineptitude on the courts.
Afterwards our mutual friends basically said "We knew something like this was going to happen, that's why we didn't agree to live with him." Thanks for the heads up.
Don't live with friends, get everything in writing.
#74Definitely this girl who would flip out for the smallest little things.
Her ex boyfriend (who was a total arsehole) got a good, high paying job and she raged about it for an HOUR AND A HALF. Eventually I said something along the lines of 'life isn't fair sometimes deal with it' and she grabbed the book I was reading and threw it in my face.
We were carving pumpkins for Halloween and hers went wrong. She threw it on the floor and started stamping on it and screaming.
She would never wash anyone elses dishes (when everyone else in the house was happy to club in and make it a team effort as we almost always Cooked and ate together ). She'd barge the person washing out of the way, wash and dry her stuff and then storm upstairs. This happened every day.
She would repeatedly scream the house down and cry if she didn't get her hair right.
She once accused me of 'disrespecting the people of Nepal'. We were watching BBC breakfast (any Brits here will know that the 'news' on that show is pretty banal and uninteresting). I said something along those lines just as a piece about the Nepal earthquake was starting. She shouted at me for a solid 3 minutes and followed that up with a group text to my other housemates saying that I was a 'c**t' and not to be trusted.
I'd cooked a meal for the house, as I was taking my first bite (a rather large bite but it had been slow cooking for hours and I was STARVING) she started shouting at me for eating like a pig and ran upstairs crying when I called her out on how that was total b******t.
I have a million stories like this. Stuff like this happened every damn day.
#75The roommate who eats your food, uses your things without needing to ask you, but if you take one of his potato chips, he feels a disturbance in the Force and must confront you about it.
#76He was the "I drive better when I'm drunk" type. He had bottles of chew spit all around the apartment. Never cleaned. Some how when he showered something on him prompted mold or something to grow in the shower. I had to remove it multiple times. Then I found out he hadn't payed rent for 4 months. I've got more...
#77Ate literally all of my groceries ($60 worth) the day I got them while I was gone. He made a very nice meal for his gf and her friend as well. "Sorry bro... don't have the cash and didn't want to go to the store."
Also drank all my beer.
Stayed up doing coke until I left for class... regularly
Slept with my gf while I was out of town
Yes... in that order. I really didn't like that gf much. Oh, and didn't do the dishes, clean, etc.
#78I lived with 1 guy who constantly peed on the toilet seat and didn't clean it up. When I confronted him, he denied it and suggested that maybe I did it. I'm a girl, and I don't squat-piss in my own home.
#79Stole my old phone and some other electronics to sell on craigslist for rent money. He gave the landline phone number (mine) for call backs. I was taking a message for him and asked what it was about, when the caller described wanting to buy "the bedazzled sidekick"...I started looking thru my things and figured it out.
#80Meth heads, guy and his girlfriend, wouldn't leave the bedroom for weeks cause they thought my other roommate and I had it out to get them. Sh*t and piss in many, 10+, empty paint cans cause you know, not leaving the room due to fear. They left the paint cans in the closet when they left in the middle of the night 2 weeks after being served eviction notice due to non-payment. Nailed bedroom door shut with about 30 nails to keep us out due to paranoia of physical violence after eviction notice. When they left, they locked the front door, then broke it down because they forgot something.
Had to replace everything in the bedroom including carpet and door, walls needed repainted and in some place re-drywalled, new front door. Out $2500 for rent plus another $3000 for repairs.
#81My current roomate does the sh**tiest thing ever.
He will use the microwave for popcorn, take it out early, and leave the remaining time on the timer uncleared. F*****g monster.
#82I made the mistake of living with someone who had no regard for the way they lived. He would complain about his lifestyle from time to time, but wouldn't do anything to fix it. In the year I lived with him, his room was cleaned once. That one time sent a wave of stench through the apartment after he awakened it from it's slumber. This was also the type of guy who complained about not having cash, or constantly felt sick, but chose to spend a majority of his nights at the bar.
Not sure what he's up to now, he wanted to become a teacher, so good luck to him.
#83Had the worst roommate during my sophomore year of college. This guy would literally sit on the couch in the living room all day watching TV, playing on his computer, and listening to his god awful music with the biggest headphones (All at the same time. Yes.). On top of that, he just left his dishes, bowls, and utensils around after he finished eating in the living room, so my friends and I never hung around there. If my friends even bothered to come, we'd just hang around a little bit in the bedroom before heading out.
Oh, did I mention the bathroom? No? Well this guy barely used the bathroom. And when he did, oh dear Lord. He would take 50-70 minutes taking the shower (God knows what he was doing since the smell of him didn't improve whatsoever afterwards; it would sometimes get worse), and if he took a s**t? I literally went in the first time afterwards and threw up. That was when I was moving in, and I didn't want to embarrass my parents and friend who were helping me move the furnitures. So when they asked what was wrong, I didn't want to point fingers at my roommate on our first day, so I just lied.
And when this m**********r sleeps. He takes off his shirt and exposes the smell of death, which will squeeze and suffocate your nose. It's so hard to sleep. On top of that, he snores. Actually, I'm not even sure if that's snoring. It sounds like someone's choking him by stuffing Hot Cheetos down his throat but he's satisfied with that and just eats all of that s**t up. I literally had to invest in some earplugs.
Oh, and I'm pretty sure he killed my pet turtle.
#84My first roommate in college was a nightmare. She'd party all night and then wake me up at 4am when she got in to see if she got any phone calls (this was before cell phones were common, but our college phones had voicemail). It was a dry campus, and she would drink all the time in the dorm and leave bottles and cans all over the place. I drank too, but I at least had the common sense to hide the bottles! She'd come back from sorority parties trashed off her a*s and expected me to take care of her. It came to a head when I went back home for the weekend, and when I got back she had put a leaky McDondald's cup on my brand new laptop. Who knows how long it had been sitting there. I told her I was going down to the student life office to see about getting my own dorm. It was worth the extra fee to live alone. Luckily there was an empty dorm on the same floor I had been on and was able to move there. I went back to my dorm to start packing up, and the c**t had already moved all of my stuff out into the hallway! I hadn't even told her I was able to move out yet! Turns out she wasn't cut out for college, anyway. She dropped out after one year.
#85I made the mistake of living with friends, and it all went to s**t.
They were all slobs and I got really tired of cleaning up after them, but that wasn't the worst of it. No, the worst of it was my one friend's boyfriend. You see, she had previously been in a bad relationship, and all of us *promised* we would say if we thought she was in another bad one.
Did that work? lol no
Everyone hated her new boyfriend but I was the only one that flat out told her she was being used and she should get out. I became Enemy #1, as suddenly everyone else was *so supportive* of her relationship. They *plotted* ways to get back at me. I actually overheard them saying what they were going to do around the apartment to p**s me off.
Jokes on her. They're divorced now, and one of the others in a spiraling-to-hell relationship. The one I remained friends with (she didn't plot, she was just a slob) is still contently married.
I did get a half-hearted apology one time, but it was cut off when I said I wasn't sorry for anything.
#86I was renting a room from a friend of a friend. She had just bought the house & was doing some updates on it, so she needed to get into my room to measure a wall while I was at class.
Unbeknownst to me, I had accidentally locked the door behind me (it had one of the push locks in the handle, but you could still open the door from the inside) when I left. When I got home, I had a passive-aggressive note on my door asking me to please not lock my door because it was a fire hazard. I wanted to acknowledge that I got her request, so I went to talk to her. The conversation went something like this:
**Me:** Hey, I'm sorry the door was locked. I didn't realize I did it, but I think I figured out what happened.
**Her:** Okay, because the door was locked & that's a fire hazard, so don't do it again.
**Me:** I'll try not to, but I didn't mean to lock it in the first place.
**Her:** Whatever. Just don't do it again.
**Me:** You mean the next time I accidentally lock my door without realizing it, don't do that?
**Her, exasperated:** Uh, yeah.
Unfortunately, that kind of logic was pretty much the rule for the time I lived there. Another example is that she got a dog (despite her mom, the owner of the house, telling her not to), refused to train the dog, and when the dog ate one of my DVDs, her response was, "Well, you shouldn't have left the DVD on the coffee table."
#87I used to be Mormon, and went to BYU's Rexburg campus in eastern Idaho... lots of sheltered, weird Mormon kids there.
I shared an apartment with one guy who took the prohibition from drinking coffee VERY seriously. He refused to call our coffee table anything but a "hot cocoa table."
Then he spotted a bottle of Coffee Mate creamer (which I would put in hot chocolate) I had in the fridge, so he asked to speak with me. "JuniorBaconCheese... I found your coffee. I think we need to talk." I laughed in his face, and then tried to explain what was and wasn't coffee... He was naive, humorless and incredibly uninformed, but all things considered, could have been worse.
EDIT: Oh yeah - the Mormon 'Word of Wisdom' prohibits the use of coffee, tea, alcohol and nicotine. I forget that some people don't know Mormonism's quirks go beyond just the polygamist history...
#88First year of college. My two roommates got a major kick out of yelling weird s**t down at people as they walked by our top floor dorm. It was usually pretty harmless, if probably pretty annoying/confusing for the people on the receiving end. Anyway, as guilty as I was of laughing about it, I never participated, and did a lot of eye rolling at them.
One day they were doing this, and I went to take a shower. When I got back the dorm was empty. Didn't think anything of it, must have grabbed lunch.
Soon there is a knock on the door. Still in my towel I open the door, expecting the roommates or friends from down the hall. Nope. Four enormous, hugely pissed off black guys.
They want to know who has something to say. Who's got the big balls now, say that s**t to their face.
Oh god they didn't....
Yep they did.
So now I'm a 150lb white dude in a towel, and these four dudes have been basically hate-crimed. I swear up and down I didn't do it, that I wouldn't do that, and that they're more than welcome to hang out until my roommates got back, who will surely offer them the apology they're entitled to.
But they were too pissed. They called me everything. Didn't believe me at all. Said I was hiding in the shower and all this. I've never felt so sh**ty in my life.
And nothing ever happened. I cussed my roommates out huge, but that was it. One of the black dudes saw me later in the year and, sort of condescendingly I think, gave me a "last chance" to be the bigger man and confess. I told him again it wasn't me, that it was the roommates. I put my hand out for a shake, but he declined and made fun of me about hiding in the shower again.
Still bummed it happened.